| Wanting to Commit Suicide |
|
| Rinpoche heard that a student in Hong
Kong wanted to commit suicide. He sent her the following
message, and later, she abandoned her idea. |
Please think that I am with you. I am always with you.
If you can, do the practice of the 35
Buddhas. It is good to recite each name of the 35 Buddhas
50 times. In one day, you can do half in the morning and half
at night. After each of these two sessions, also recite the
confession prayer at the end. You can do one confession prayer
for all 50 sets of recitations. That is like doing 50 confessions
at one time.
Please practice the Eight
Verses of Mind Training and recite OM MANI PADME HUM after
each verse, while meditating on the meaning of that verse.
Begin with refuge and bodhicitta, and the four immeasurables*.
This is extremely good to do, and each time you recite it
is the same as giving me a billion dollars and will make me
extremely happy.
*Note: The Four Immeasurables are:
How wonderful it would be if all sentient beings were free
of suffering and its cause…
How wonderful it would be if all sentient beings had happiness
and the cause of happiness…
How wonderful it would be if all sentient beings were never
separated from the happiness of higher rebirth and liberation…
How wonderful it would be if all sentient beings were to
abide in equanimity, free of hatred and attachment.
Contemplating Suicide
A student brought a friend who had
contemplated suicide while depressed to see Rinpoche. Rinpoche
gave some advice directly at the time, and the next day sent
the following additional suggestions in a letter:
It is also very useful to think that depression is not that
undeserved for me. I deserve to have this, because I have
done negative actions, various ones, all sorts of negative
actions, in the past, and not just in this life, but from
beginningless rebirth, therefore I deserve to experience this.
The great bodhisattva saint Shantideva said: “In the
past I gave such harm to others, therefore I deserve to receive
this.” This is another very basic practice to make the
mind happy, by accepting it and also by thinking of it as
a result of karma done by oneself. When you think, “This
is my karma,” it makes everything very simple. Whatever
problem there is, this thought prevents there being too much
fuss.
Generally, problems in life are created by the mind. This
moment’s thought creates this moment’s problems.
This moment’s thought is created by the mind of the
past.
In the hundreds of volumes of teachings called the Kangyur,
the Buddha explained depression that you can’t find
a reason for, and also sudden states of depression and unhappiness
that come when you wake up in the morning, and similarly in
the evening. In his teachings on the shortcomings of not practicing
the five lay vows, Buddha explained that depression that suddenly
happens at nighttime is the result of sexual misconduct committed
in the past. Since the action was performed out of self-cherishing,
it becomes negative karma.
One solution is to purify the mental continuum of these
sufferings. The purification is not only in order not to experience
depression. There are many other sufferings to be experienced
in the human realm, as well as in the lower realms. By purifying
the cause of those negative experiences, suffering for so
many eons can be avoided.
Performing Medicine Buddha practice, confession to the 35
Buddhas practice with prostrations, and Vajrasattva practice
purifies not only the karma of sexual misconduct but also
all other negative karmas.
The other technique is to apply the methods I mentioned
before for transforming the mind into positive thoughts, looking
at depression as positive rather than only negative, by thinking
of the benefits of depression.
As I mentioned yesterday, you can recall how powerful it
is to use that depression for meditation in order to generate
a good heart and loving compassion. You can recall how this
depression becomes the most powerful means of purifying the
heaviest negative karma and the most powerful means of collecting
the most extensive merit. That is how depression becomes the
quickest path to achieve enlightenment.
This way, your depression is really very positive. It becomes
so precious, like a jewel. You can make it so beneficial for
other beings. You can use it to cause all happiness for all
sentient beings, especially to bring them to enlightenment,
by thinking of the benefits of the problem and using this
technique for transforming problems into happiness. When you
don’t know or don’t think of the benefits of the
problem, your mind labels it a problem. You label it negative
and then exaggerate. Then you think how terrible it is, how
terrible I am.
One very important thing to be able to apply the methods
I explained—especially to use depression to develop
the thought of loving compassion—is to make a strong
determination every day. Every morning, after you think of
the meaning of your life, make this strong determination:
“From now on, especially today, I won’t let myself
be controlled by ego, self-cherishing thought, and will never
be separated from cherishing others and from loving compassion,
even for one second. I will never allow myself to be bothered
by problems, to be disturbed by them, to make a mountain from
this molehill.” Make a very strong determination: “I’ll
be strong. I won’t do that.” Generate courage
in the morning. Plan out your day. Then you can be ready when
it comes, like an army that trains for years before the actual
fight, so that when an enemy comes, they are ready. Similarly,
you prepare in the morning to fight your self-cherishing thoughts.
If you’re not prepared, you can miss the chance to achieve
great inner peace and to use your problem to cause happiness
for all sentient beings.
Please, I want to remind you again that, when the suicidal
mind arises, there’s an external spirit involved, besides
karma. The person doesn’t know, starts to hallucinate,
thinking this is the only solution for peace and happiness.
But it’s totally opposite to that.
Therefore, at the beginning, as I told you, you should look
at your mind as the baby or the student and yourself as the
teacher. Therefore, you don’t listen to the mind, as
the baby. It’s very dangerous. Before you follow the
mind, analyze whether the shortcomings of an action are greater
than the benefits. Do whatever has the greatest benefit or
at least greater benefit and fewer shortcomings.
Otherwise, if you don’t analyze, it’s very dangerous.
It stops you from having vast amounts of merit, and giving
enormous benefits to others.
Besides past negative karma, those outside spirits also
harm you when the suicidal thought arises, so don’t
follow it. Just ignore it. Let it disappear, like wind passing
through. |