My very dear one,
Regarding your question about marriage, I checked, and it would be bad for you to get married. It would be best for you not to get married. Also, I checked regarding children, and it was the same: bad for you to have children and best for you not to have children.

If you have children then your life is doubly, triply busy. You have to think about the financial side of things and what the child would need. Then, regarding having a husband, there is the possibility that in the future you may leave him, or your husband may leave you. Maybe you will have a disagreement with your husband, and then after a child is born all the attention is put on the child, and then the wife feels that the husband is no longer interested in her, or the wife is actually not interested in the husband any more. The child may turn out differently to the kind of child you want and then you may have emotional problems, sadness, disappointment, and depression. You have already had depression, so you know what I mean.

A child can be beneficial for world peace and for him or herself. Even if a child can’t benefit others, it can have a meaningful, good, happy life, not harming itself and not harming others. However, often a child does harmful things, and does not listen to its parents. Even if a parent is giving the child advice, the child thinks its parents are the enemy, and only makes the parents angry, disturbs their minds, rather than giving them peace. If a child meditates, practices and learns the Dharma, that’s different, but if a child doesn’t want to do that, or has a different view and way of thinking, then it can cause great suffering.

Many people think how wonderful life would be, how it would be like a pure land if they had children, but then when they have children they have no time at all to meditate or to practice. They can’t sleep at night because the child wakes up and during the day it’s the same. In the end they have no time to practice.

Many times we think things will happen the way we want them to, but that doesn’t mean that will actually happen. Often, it’s not like that, it’s totally opposite to our dream, it is suffering. I am just letting you know so you can be careful. This is what I saw in my observations: it would be best for you not to get married. Of course, there may be some karma that you can’t control. Anyway I just wanted to let you know. This way you have so much freedom to meditate to benefit sentient beings, to deepen your practice to benefit others.

If you have a child it is just one sentient being, so you benefit just that one sentient being, but it’s not of so much benefit for others. What I am telling you is not always the case for everyone, but this is what I saw in my observations for you. It doesn’t mean it is the same for everyone.

With much love and prayers...